Running With The Balls

This past weekend was indeed one that is noteworthy...not only was it so hot and humid that I can finally declare that the dog days of summer are upon us...WAIT...I must digress on the previous statement...

Dog Days of Summer...the crappiest, hottest, most unstandable days of summer are associated with the canine world? I just don't understand. We are loveable, trustworthy, brilliant creatures...ok, maybe we like to roll around in the dirt and eat bugs and grass occassionally...but that can be done almost anytime of the year. I mean, one moment out in that hot weather and I feel like I could hop right into a cool, refreshing pool...and I never get my tootsies wet unless I am forced to! So maybe the human take on these dog days is that it makes you resort to doing things that you wouldn't necessarily do to stay cool...and the humans had to observe the dogs doing these things before they were able to figure it out for themselves!!! Now it all makes sense...those lowlifes were too dumb to figure out how to stay cool...the invention of the pool only came along after they saw us canines frolicking in a cool stream on a hot day...and a/c only got figured out after they saw us venting hot air from our body via panting. Oh my, the canine world alone is purely responsible for teaching humans how to adapt to the ever chaning ecosystem! Oh my, I must go and contact Animal Planet and tell them of my unbelievable discovery....they have dogs running that corporation, right?

Ok, back to the balls...so this weekend....I was given back my balls...BOTH OF THEM!...sadly no, not the ones I lost on the chopping block...I said I got my balls back, not my manhood...on Saturday I was beside myself with happiness when I got back both my basketball and my bright ornage indestructi-ball! Oh, I have spent countless hours crying and barking whenever I happened to catch a glimpse...I guess the human finally took pity on me and gave them back in an attempt to make me happy! I got so caught up in my celebration that I started shredding my bed...it was quite the party...wish you could have been there...I was ripping up the stuffing and fleece and catipulting above my back....a one-dog party, of course I had to be responsible for throwing my own confetti.

But the human wasn't so pleased when she found the remnants of my celebration....she took my indestructi-ball AWAY!!! She lugged in the roaring cleaner on wheels and sucked up the last shreds of my delightment...and told me to go lay down when I barked in protest....but as luck would have it, a piece killed the cleaner and made it smoke...and run no more it could! Hahaha! Who has the last word after all!